My Public Apology

[Zeeshan]

I am nervous and embarassed to write this as all eyez on me and I am making vulnerable...

When I joined the forum under the name and avatar of Gopal Bhar, after the initiation and initial rough bump I was accepted by all. I became popular and adored and at that time I had lot of friends on Facebook - the social support which I did not cherish or value.

Gradually as time went on and life progressed - whether it be due to personal issues or frustrations...my popularity backfired. I became conceited, arrogant and my ego was reinforced. Popularity went to my head and I felt I was undeserved superior to others even though not achieving anything significant in life. (Not that one should achieve anything not to be feel superior, but hey.)

Many of you don't know under my nice guy pretense I messaged several members and abused the hell out of them. I did not know better and was not the bigger man.

Further, I would write rants and chicken out and log out of forum. If it as Twitter I would be shredded and fed to the dogs and ratioed like hell forced to close my account.

All I can do is now ask for forgiveness and ask to be taken back to the family that I called BC.

Two reasons compelled me to pen (who tf uses the word 'pen' anyway? Probably Zunaid and Shaad...) this apology.

• If by apologizing it helps to spread good vibes and positive energy that may ripple to our team and make our gameplay better than so be it... I am willing to sacrifice
• Most importantly back in the days Sohel Nadeem Rahman - who had the pole position in leaderboard as well as Nadim - opened a thread apologizing to myself. He did not have to. He showed me what a bigger man he was. That was a great lesson and inspirational teaching for me.

I cannot change the past nor edit what I have said. All I can do is look forward.

Also I do not want to wallow in self-pity and woe-is-I because at the end of the day we are all doing our best. I know I am not in this alone and many of us are facing personal problems.

Finally, when I was a editor Reverse Swing once said which roughly goes something likes this:

Just because I am acting the way I am doesn't mean I should that way. He wants to be a role model.

Yes. I get it. I finally get it. And I hope this forum flourishes once again!

Thank you.

-Zee ( People Magazine Sexiest Man Alive, 2022 and Alpha Male)