How do you overcome your FOBias?

[Zeeshan]

Share your experiences of overcoming cultural shocks.

[layperson]

I dont know about overcoming cultural shocks but I got a big cultue shock when I first came to canada as a student. I went to the university athletic centre the first time thinking I will check out the swimming pool and go for a few laps. I went in the change room with my little beach shorts to take a shower. Lo and behold men of all colour and age were showering naked !!!!! biggest and only culture shock I got till now.

[Zeeshan]

I have been told many times about my b.o. issue. I still defy the system.

[Ajfar]

This girl in my gym class asked me if I was gay back in my freshman year in high school. I had recently moved to america only a few months ago and yet to learn what gay means. So I just stood there with a random look on my face as I had no idea what she was talking about. So sometime in the near future when I did learn the meaning of the word I was confused as I had no idea what I did would make her think that.

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[Zunaid]

I had a fairly uneventful acclimatization to the US with barely any episodes of culture shock save one. Having had an external-looking upbringing and then having steeped up on US culture via voracious readings and the TV, the only one time I was linguistically stumped was at my first American fast food experience - "for here or to go". I was non-plussed for a few seconds before I figured out what was being asked of me....

I had since contemplated writing a guide book for FOB fellow desis to navigate the pitfalls of America. I had the title all figured out too: "For here or to go: a deshi student's guide to Markin lifestyle".

Appendix would have included training on how to win at "quarters" and a collection of the best classic pick-up lines guaranteed to succeed, such as "So, is it hot in here? Or is it just … never mind..."

Actually, I had more of a culture shock when I first met up with fellow Indian grad students. The interesting head-wave that signifies yes but to me meant no: Other other than the regular head nod, they will move the head like a oval moving tangentially on a concave surface placed horizontally to signify 'yes'. 'No' is the simple moving of the head from side to side, the median plane of the head always perpendicular to the shoulders. See - that wasn't easy was it?

[Habib]

Originally Posted by layperson
I dont know about overcoming cultural shocks but I got a big cultue shock when I first came to canada as a student. I went to the university athletic centre the first time thinking I will check out the swimming pool and go for a few laps. I went in the change room with my little beach shorts to take a shower. Lo and behold men of all colour and age were showering naked !!!!! biggest and only culture shock I got till now.

OMG imagine if there's a gay rapist in the change room! (pun intended)

[Nafi]

Originally Posted by bangladesh_sy
This girl in my gym class asked me if I was gay back in my freshman year in high school. I had recently moved to america only a few months ago and yet to learn what gay means. So I just stood there with a random look on my face as I had no idea what she was talking about. So sometime in the near future when I did learn the meaning of the word I was confused as I had no idea what I did would make her think that.

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Thats very conceivable, most young men from Bangladesh/India, when they come to western countries, their grasping of the English Language general shyness makes them effeminate.

My biggest cultural shock, were seeing the toilets in Bangladesh, for the first time. The amount of street dogs, the first approaching mob of beggars in syhlet airport. Though this was my first 'memorable' experience of Bangladesh, being seven years old, i was two last I went, but i obviously didn't remember.

Though I had also had a culture shock in the UK, was going to a muslim neigbourhood in London and seeing women covered from head to toe...this is the only culture shock that still makes me uncomfortable.

[Electrequiem]

Originally Posted by bangladesh_sy
This girl in my gym class asked me if I was gay back in my freshman year in high school. I had recently moved to america only a few months ago and yet to learn what gay means. So I just stood there with a random look on my face as I had no idea what she was talking about. So sometime in the near future when I did learn the meaning of the word I was confused as I had no idea what I did would make her think that.

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This brings up a good point. The current "trendy" outfits that Bangladeshi youth (male) wear are not very heterosexual by Western standards.

[Zeeshan]

The middle one, for instance, E? Add some chained zippers and gel in hair and he's all set.

But hey, it's not as if I wasn't wearing bell bottom jeans and striped golf tee when I first got "off boat"..

[Rubu]

My cultural shock that I even to date did not overcome is two guys in a public restroom on two urinal and nothing separating them, pissing and talking at the same time.

Another one, when four of us (3 US + me) was driving by past a strip club, one suddenly said his sister works there. then he said he was kidding. I guess, I got over this cultural shock by now, but it was a stock that they can joke about things like this.

[Purbasha T]

Oh well..A couple (my classmates) kissing outside my college classroom. But tbh, I wasn't really shocked about the kissing, but rather about the people who were involved in it. They were Muslims (and unmarried) and the girl used to wear hijab and stuff.

[Bancan]

In all seriousness, the easiest way to do it is associate yourself with people from every race. I see way too many brown kids come to Canada and hang around with people from their country. I understand that is easier socially with people you have a lot in common with. But if you are fortunate enough to be in this multi culture society then why not take advantage of it. Also please speak English. That is a huge social barrier for people that come here. Start speaking English everywhere. Speak it at home, with friends. It will help in every way.

[Electrequiem]

Well, Gopal, that guy in the middle is still borderline. I've seen worse: skinny jeans (as skinny as can be before people start thinking you raided your sister's closet), shirts so tight that you can count the wearer's ribs over them (with the top 3 buttons undone...), and the most ridiculous hairstyles.

[Beamer]

I know this dude who walked into a Subway restaurant, looked around for the escalator going down underground, then went into the restroom thinking that was the door leading to the escalator.

[Beamer]

I was shocked beyond my senses when the first time I saw this guy walking his dog and picking up the poop in a grocery bag ( garbage bag for deshis ). I was like WTF?

[Habib]

Rifat vai where are you? Please contribute here man.

[Nafi]

Originally Posted by Purbasha T
Oh well..A couple (my classmates) kissing outside my college classroom. But tbh, I wasn't really shocked about the kissing, but rather about the people who were involved in it. They were Muslims (and unmarried) and the girl used to wear hijab and stuff.